More Fun

I'm not one to just do something because it's suppose to be done and this is how I feel about New Year's resolutions. Not necessarily the first item on my to-do list for the year, but I think I found one that I can handle and totally think is necessary. Here it is:

HAVE MORE FUN.

Yep, that's it. Think I can handle it. Last year was more about keeping my head above water, take it as it comes and make it though it and I'm proud to say I did that and learned a lot about myself in the process. But, I'm ready, this year, I'm ready to have more fun. We work hard in this house if you didn't know that, and I'm actually a true believer in the value of hard work. But, more and more I realize that this life is not necessarily about surviving, okay, well sometimes it is. But, there is nothing wrong with having some fun and I plan to have lots of it!

So here are some of the things I plan to do in accordance to this tough, tough goal. (I know, how will I ever accomplish this, hope I don't throw my hands up in frustration and give up! The agony!)

Have fun with Chris - Totally already on track with this one. I bought him the COMPLETE series of Seinfeld and we are currently making our way through season 7, if you have any favorites let me know and I'll track down the episode, pop in the disc and laugh the night away with Chris. HA!

Fun with the kids - I admittedly am a worrier when it comes to my boys. Am I too strict? Am I strict enough? Are they spoiled? Are they eating enough vegetables? Do they get enough sleep? Am I teaching them enough? I plan to worry less about the little things and enjoy the big picture and repeat to myself often, "I am a good mother and everything will work out. Have fun! Have fun! Have fun!" Also on track, bought a membership to Discovery Gateway and have been barreling through the fun every week!

Remember the fun times - Whether this is documenting the current good times on this blog or taking stock of past good times this is something I can do. I still think about my Mom a lot and I'm trying to make sure it's the good stuff. The stuff that makes me laugh or smile when I think about her. That's important to me.

Fun with the family - My Dad is smiling more lately, after a tough year for him that I can only pretend to understand, he is in a better place. Blessed be! His chuckle is back to normal and there's some sarcasm coming though. He is working on all sorts of projects and talking about the here and now, all really good signs that life is starting to feel good again. Anyways, I have all sorts of family around and that is a blessing. I just need to make sure the emphasis is on fun!

Did I miss anything? I think I covered it. Fun. Fun. Fun. I'm funning myself to death. As a matter of fact we're off to see the Harlem Globe Trotters tonight with some family. Now if that's not fun, I mean really...FUN!

Sweetness

I know it's mid-January, but there's part of me that is still basking in the holidays and I felt the need to post just one last insight from my holiday experience. Last year the holidays were a little somber for me, my Mom had just passed in November, and gratefully we scaled way back on the festivities. There were great moments, but admittedly I was a little numb. I had a lot of sleepless nights and reoccurring images of my mother in her last moments and well, it was just heavy stuff.

Anyways, fast forward to a year later. A much different picture, Harrison is the grand old age of 3 1/2 and well aware of the meaning of Christmas and so excited about everything that comes with that. So, in turn, I'm excited, the preparations were well under way early on and my ability to do these things was in a much better state. And I'd have to say I noticed a sweetness to this season that I haven't in any of my past Christmases. I'm sure that this had to do with my mother's passing and now, this year, my being able to accept this spirit into my Christmas celebrations.

So there is one event in particular that had me soaring in this sweetness, Chris got invited with his board at West Mini to the MoTab (Mormon Tabernacle Choir) Christmas concert with VIP treatment! I have never been to one of these concerts before and I was REALLY excited. My relationship with the MoTab has grown over the years and that relationship relates directly to my mother. She was always a big fan and revered them, I might add. Me, not so much. But, in more recent years, I've started to have an appreciation for them as part of my heritage and a treasure. I started recording their program on TV, "Music and the Spoken Word," a few years ago when Harrison was a baby. We sometimes listen to it on Sundays when getting ready for church.

I will always be grateful for one Sunday program in particular. It was October 2008, I had it on in the background while getting ready and I was drawn in by a song. I sat down on the couch, listened closer and started to cry. These were the words of the song:

HOMEWARD BOUND
Words and Music by Marta Keen

LOVE IS SPOKEN HERE album - The Mormon Tabernacle Choir

In the quiet misty morning, when the moon has gone to bed,
When the sparrows stop their singing and the sky is clear and red,
When the summer's ceased its gleaming, when the corn is past its prime,
When adventure's lost its meaning, I'll be homeward bound in time.

Bind me not to the pasture. Chain me not to the plow.
Set me free to find my calling and I'll return to you somehow.

If you find it's me you're missing, if you're hoping I'll return,
To your thought I'll soon be list'ning; in the road I'll stop and turn.
Then the wind will set me racing as my journey nears its end,
And the path I'll be retracing when I'm homeward bound again.

Bind me not to the pasture. Chain me not to the plow.
Set me free to find my calling and I'll return to you somehow.

In the quiet misty morning when the moon has gone to bed,
When the sparrows stop their singing, I'll be homeward bound again.

I felt so strongly that this song was talking about my mother. I cried and cried that morning and looked up the words to the song later and cried again. She passed away a month later. I often listen to this song and it gives me great comfort that she had been ready to go. Sometimes you just know things are there for you, this was one of those times for me.

So, as I sat in this year's Christmas Concert with the MoTab I once again was wrapped up in the gentle spirit of this choir and the sweet spirit of the season. My mother would have loved to have been there with me and I somehow felt that she was....

Mom's Sugar cookies

One of my favorite holiday activities this year was making sugar cookies with the boys. This sugar cookie recipe goes back to the early 1900s and my Grandma Helen McDonald Livingston, she brought it into the family and it is one of those recipes that you really should have someone coaching you through the finer points. For me, that was my mother and I so excited to start the tradition with my boys. It just felt good to me, the smell, the texture, the old family cookie cutters and most of all vividly remembering of my mother helping me when I got stuck with lumps in the dough or couldn't get the right consistency and her hand mixing the dough with me. I've made and consumed more of these cookies during the holidays than I care to admit, and ask any of my siblings, the taste of them is like going home. Anyways, here are a few shots of the task in action:

Harrison was actually a great little cookie

maker and stayed on task for at least the making

of the dough and a dozen or so cookie cut-outs.

But you can see he was really drawn to the flour

part of the whole deal. At some point I looked up

and saw flour EVERYWHERE and had to just press on

realize this is what making memories is all about.

Even the messy part.

Success!

My little taster.

Carter loved the cookie tasting too.

This is the tin can that mother kept all of the special

cookie cutters, flour sifter, and rolling pin. I will continue

to keep them in it.

So much flour that Carter pretty much was covered

in it just by playing in the kitchen.

The cookie cutters, the ones with the metal handles

are the really old ones, cool huh.

Sadly, I didn't take any pictures of the decorating part, but of course Harrison loved it! He DUMPED sprinkles on the cookies and they did look pretty neat. Should have taken a picture or two, but don't worry many years to come of this recipe, I assure you.

The holidays in pictures

Some of the good times from the holidays--

My dad, if this picture doesn't say "Happy Holidays" I

don't know what does!

Harrison bonding with Riley over the iPhone.

My cute niece and I...

The night before Christmas, note the leg lamp in the window...Chris's pride and joy of Christmas Eve, it only comes out for the one night a year.

Another thing you can kinda see here that Carter has a black eye...I know, poor child. Honest truth, Wrigley the dog ran past Carter on Christmas Eve and whacked him in the eye with his tail! Can you believe it? Or should I ask do you believe it? Too rehearsed? Too much detail? Anyways, just in time for Christmas, so sad.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care and looks

like Santa already visited at this point...just waiting for the morning to come. I'll have you know Harrison slept fine and even slept in until about 9 on Christmas morning. Me on the other hand, I was so excited I didn't sleep well at all!

Harrison and Carter enjoying the big gift from Santa this year.

Harrison asked for a Utah helmet from Santa, but I

have heard from a reliable source that Santa is

actually a Cougar fan. I know shocking right!

Carter showing off his artwork.

Harrison so proud of his first painting. One of

the few times he has been totally up for posing for the camera.

Carter and Dad opening a favorite present for him this year.

Anything "Melmo"(Elmo)is a hit.

And on to Uncle Dane and Aunt Amy's house for more fun!

Wrigley's big gift! Wrigley AKA Carter's black eye offender.

Harrison and Carter's big gift, wow, a train station from Oma. So cool, they LOVED it and now you're probably wondering why Harrison is naked. Well, long story short, he was so busy playing with his train set that when he had to go to the potty he kinda forgot where it was and ran into the laundry room instead. He ran in, not a moment too soon, just in time to make it and well, the laundry room got a nice surprise wet spot on the floor. On the bright side the washing machine was right there ready to wash his very wet Christmas jammies.

I have a video of Harrison and Carter opening their train station and it's really cute. Harrison when he rips off the wrapping paper yells, "Oh my goodness!" All I know is we are so fortunate and I loved the holiday magic through the eyes of my children...

Mom's To-Do list

I love the idea of making a blog holiday To-do list, so here it goes:

-Decorate house - check

-Order Christmas cards - check

-Have a better attitude about the holidays - check

After a flood that put the house in shambles and with Chris working a ton more this month I was starting to show some signs of holiday UN-cheer. But, when he worked 'til 2am Friday night, 6 hours on Saturday, and was then totally exhausted Saturday night...Well, I was plum worn out too and needed a little better perspective. I woke up on Sunday and decided, "This is just a little bump in the road and my time to put in some more elbow grease to make the holidays work for all of us!" Sometimes that's all it takes...a better attitude (and more organization on my part helps), imagine that! :)

-Holiday shopping for the boys - check

Things still to do:

-Exercise at least once during the month of December

Winter makes me want to just curl up in a ball and eat! Fight the urge! Fight!

-Go to the spa and do something relaxing for myself

Anyone want to join me? Anyone?

-Address and mail cards

-Complete neighbor gifts

-Help with RS dinner

-Make my Mom's fabulous sugar cookies and share them

I've been known in years past to eat ALL of them completely by myself! Fight the urge! Fight!

-Assemble and wrap gifts

-Help the boys with their Christmas gifts

-Mail gifts to family and friends

-Do something special for my hard-working husband

Any great ideas?

-Oversee the contractors tearing down and putting my plaster walls back together before mold starts to grow. Happy Holidays?

There it is, the good and the bad! All in all, I'm starting to feel a little more cheery as Christmas approaches. Afterall, how can you not love Christmas and all that it represents? Merry Christmas!

Thanks 09

We had a great Thanksgiving, special thanks to Oma for all

the help with the feast! We are so blessed, I can't

say enough of how grateful I am this year.

Harrison got to build his first

gingerbread house and he was so excited about it!

Really one of his happiest little moments

EVER. Oma and Natalee were great teachers on

how to decorate.

We also got to go on the Polar Express while

up in Midway. Harrison was worried

Santa was "too busy," so when he came to

talk with him he was a little star struck. Since

then Harrison has been walking around the

house saying, "Santa loves me and I love him."

Carter was so good on the train, and so cute!

Halloween

Halloween did not disappoint around here! Traditions were on track: root beer-check, sloppy joes-check, donuts-check, amazing pumkins-double check, tummy ache-yep check.

Here are some of the highlight pictures from the day:

We started off the day

with a tumble or two in

the leaves.

Carter got his first time-out,

and I think he was kinda

excited about it. I got the

impression he thought it meant he

was finally a big boy like

Harrison, little does he realize...

but it was still pretty cute.

Here are the boys all dressed up

with a copy of the book as proof

of where the idea came from...

great story called

"Dex-The Heart of a Hero"

Headed out for trick-or-treating,

Harrison was so excited, but not

about the pictures!

My favorite picture of the night,

Harrison loving every bit of

the excitement and realization

that people really do just hand

out FREE CANDY! What a great holiday!

And yes, the family shot...

I have to add one little tid-bit about Harrison, he had such a great time but at the end of the night he had a little meltdown and I had to take him up to his room to calm him down and get him ready for bedtime. Well, he was really concerned when I said maybe he should go down and tell everyone he had a fun Halloween because you know, you always want to leave a party on an upbeat and wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong impression. So, he calmed down and he went to everyone in the house and ernestly said "Thank you for my fun Halloween." He wanted to make sure there was no mistake about it, he loved Halloween and wants everyone to do it again next year.

Celebrate the Good Times

Over the weekend Chris and I went to Vegas. We had a blast! My birthday was the occasion and U2 graciously hosted the celebration.;)

Bono was a true sport and gave his

heart as always for the

performance, thanks man.

And Fergie from Black-Eyed Peas

was as "Glamourous" as expected.

We had general admission tickets and I'm not sure at what age you outgrow the mob mentality in the front of the stage, but 33 wasn't it for me. We were there with the Irish foreigners that traveled across the pond to see what they consider "the world's house band" and with those poor suckers that had been waiting in line all day to get a good spot.

The world's house band, U2.

Now, I don't always expect this type of treatment on my birthday, but I do have a thing from growing up that when you've survived a kinda tough year you celebrate the good times a little more than usual. I've only had a couple of these types of birthdays that I can remember, but this year was one those years. I look back and feel overwhelmed by what I've learned from the death of my mother and honestly relieved that the year is behind me. I also have a lot of joy, about knowing what's truly important to me and joy that I have a better perspective on what this life is all about.

So, we celebrated the good times...

Halloween here we come!

Halloween has quickly become known as the kick-off holiday around here. By New Year's Eve I'll be exhausted, but for now, I'm looking forward to the kick-off! So, you may wonder what I've been up too to prepare for the event? Well, here it goes:

1.) What Halloween is complete without a stockpile of candy. Afterall, what if they run out...

Let's be honest, stockpile is codeword

for "Mom's Stash." I'm slowly coming

around to the realization that this may

not be the best idea...

2.) It isn't Halloween unless your house says so...

We picked up these cute little metal

cut-outs at the Farmer's Market on

Saturday. The guy selling them also gave

us a free "U" which I was NOT happy

about and have only agreed to allow

it in the backyard. It's a long

story, but let's just say he got a kick

out of the rivalry in our household.

3.) Homemade costumes, why not?

We tend to do obscure costumes around

here, it will be Super Dex and his

trusty sidekick Cleevis. If you know

the reference, you're one person

I won't have to explain it too!

Wish me luck on sewing the capes!

In other news, Carter finally decided walking is a good idea afterall! At nearly 16 months he is officially walking more than crawling and is cute as a button when he does it. Arms up in the air seems to be required at this point.

He's gone, what to do...

My hubby is out of town, sad. What will I do while he's gone?

1. Stay up too late. Then, I always end up piling ridiculous amounts of pillows on the bed as if that somehow makes up for his absence next to me.

2. Clean and organize only to have most efforts slowly slip away the moment he returns...but, I'd rather have a messy house and my dear to share it with, wouldn't you?

3. Watch all of my back-logged episodes of random Reality shows and Oprah.

4. Wish he was home so I could watch our other back-logged episodes of The Office, Survivor, etc. instead.

5. Take some time for extra visits from friends and outings to get ice cream or shopping, you know, girl stuff.

6. Look forward to his return.

Not to get him in trouble or anything, but he forwarded this pic to us and

this doesn't look like a church meetinghouse on a Sunday, huh, huh?

I guess nobody's perfect, certainly not us...;)

Happy Times

So as many of you may realize this past year has been a tough one for me. My mother's death shook me to the core, and while I feel like I've been doing my best to grieve in a healthy way I can also see how devastating it has been for me. BUT, I can honestly say how I've been really happy and content lately. That's huge! I've been working really hard to make this period in my life a time where I figure some things out and make it count, for me, for my kids, for my family. And I'm just really proud of the progress I've made. So, I thought I'd document some of the moments that have been fun and just a happy time for me.

Football season - Harrison and Dad are much bigger football fans than I am, but I have to admit I enjoyed our first season game for the Utes. (Please note: I am a Cougar fan, but not a huge football fan in general so I'm kinda out of luck on this one.) Harrison was so excited he talked about it all day and when it was time to get ready to go he was chasing me around the house with his red Utah jersey, which is a rare occurrence for him to even care about his outfit.

Here's some priceless footage of him sitting in the car talking about the game.

The indoctrination begins, Father and son bonding...

Crochet - Natalee, Chris's sister brought over the crochet set that they played with as children. Harrison has been a big fan and took to it instantly, must be one of those Thomas family things.

Luau - If you get the chance Thanksgiving Point has a luau on Labor Day, so fun! A lot of people, but well worth it. Great food and of course, a great show. Carter is our little entertainer, loves a good dance song to show off his moves. Harrison was AMAZED by the fire dancers, it was a big deal. Anyways, good times with family.

Midway - I can't close the chapter on summer without at least mentioning our time in Midway. The swimming, fishing, bike riding, night jogs, good food and friends have all been a lifesaver to me this summer.

Finally, Harrison started pre-school today! I should have cried, but instead my reaction was a feeling of proud liberation and accomplishment. I can't speak for all mothers, but I feel like all the hours of time, effort and patience that I have put into my child are somehow validated. I don't know why, but it reminded me of the look on my mother's face when I left for college. As my Dad and I drove away to Utah with the car packed, my mother stood on the door stoop and waved at me. The look on her face was sheer happiness, not a tear in her eye, sheer happiness. I guess I'll have lots of moments like this as a Mom, this one was just a little glimpse.

They painted the first letter of their names, Harrison is

obsessed with the letter "H", good move Mrs. Brown! You had him

when he saw the little box with his name on it and

painting the letter "H" sealed the deal! (Please note: Upon

returning home with a blue "H," Harrison declared he

was a Cougars fan, there's still hope.)