He's gone, what to do...

My hubby is out of town, sad. What will I do while he's gone?

1. Stay up too late. Then, I always end up piling ridiculous amounts of pillows on the bed as if that somehow makes up for his absence next to me.

2. Clean and organize only to have most efforts slowly slip away the moment he returns...but, I'd rather have a messy house and my dear to share it with, wouldn't you?

3. Watch all of my back-logged episodes of random Reality shows and Oprah.

4. Wish he was home so I could watch our other back-logged episodes of The Office, Survivor, etc. instead.

5. Take some time for extra visits from friends and outings to get ice cream or shopping, you know, girl stuff.

6. Look forward to his return.

Not to get him in trouble or anything, but he forwarded this pic to us and

this doesn't look like a church meetinghouse on a Sunday, huh, huh?

I guess nobody's perfect, certainly not us...;)

Happy Times

So as many of you may realize this past year has been a tough one for me. My mother's death shook me to the core, and while I feel like I've been doing my best to grieve in a healthy way I can also see how devastating it has been for me. BUT, I can honestly say how I've been really happy and content lately. That's huge! I've been working really hard to make this period in my life a time where I figure some things out and make it count, for me, for my kids, for my family. And I'm just really proud of the progress I've made. So, I thought I'd document some of the moments that have been fun and just a happy time for me.

Football season - Harrison and Dad are much bigger football fans than I am, but I have to admit I enjoyed our first season game for the Utes. (Please note: I am a Cougar fan, but not a huge football fan in general so I'm kinda out of luck on this one.) Harrison was so excited he talked about it all day and when it was time to get ready to go he was chasing me around the house with his red Utah jersey, which is a rare occurrence for him to even care about his outfit.

Here's some priceless footage of him sitting in the car talking about the game.

The indoctrination begins, Father and son bonding...

Crochet - Natalee, Chris's sister brought over the crochet set that they played with as children. Harrison has been a big fan and took to it instantly, must be one of those Thomas family things.

Luau - If you get the chance Thanksgiving Point has a luau on Labor Day, so fun! A lot of people, but well worth it. Great food and of course, a great show. Carter is our little entertainer, loves a good dance song to show off his moves. Harrison was AMAZED by the fire dancers, it was a big deal. Anyways, good times with family.

Midway - I can't close the chapter on summer without at least mentioning our time in Midway. The swimming, fishing, bike riding, night jogs, good food and friends have all been a lifesaver to me this summer.

Finally, Harrison started pre-school today! I should have cried, but instead my reaction was a feeling of proud liberation and accomplishment. I can't speak for all mothers, but I feel like all the hours of time, effort and patience that I have put into my child are somehow validated. I don't know why, but it reminded me of the look on my mother's face when I left for college. As my Dad and I drove away to Utah with the car packed, my mother stood on the door stoop and waved at me. The look on her face was sheer happiness, not a tear in her eye, sheer happiness. I guess I'll have lots of moments like this as a Mom, this one was just a little glimpse.

They painted the first letter of their names, Harrison is

obsessed with the letter "H", good move Mrs. Brown! You had him

when he saw the little box with his name on it and

painting the letter "H" sealed the deal! (Please note: Upon

returning home with a blue "H," Harrison declared he

was a Cougars fan, there's still hope.)

Doodle Buddy

So, Harrison's latest obsession is my iPhone and an app called Doodle Buddy. He can't get enough of it and loves to draw on pictures of his family in particular. Luckily in this one we're not completely scribbled out, but you can see he's an artist in the making...

Not a big YouTube fan, but

This video is HA-larious, and made me laugh out loud! If you haven't seen it, you're missing out because over 16 million have already checked it out!

A little easier...

I think I miss my Mom. It can come on suddenly or build gradually, I never quite know what the vibe will be, but I just know it hits me sometimes. I was talking with someone the other day (more like crying at them) trying to figure out how to handle this. I can be perfectly fine for awhile and then I just crumble. Chris has to step in and pick me up or let me push my way through it for a bit and then I soon realize how great my life is and I snap out of it. Maybe if I just write about her a little, it might help...

What I miss about her the most today is just talking to her. We use to talk on the phone a lot and just to be clear, I would do all the talking. She could get me to tell stories and she always acted so interested. I knew I could get her to laugh or giggle if I wanted, I knew just what she thought would be funny. Other times she would listen to me worry over something silly or talk my way around something until I figured it out. She had an ever so slight way of guiding me through things that I never really realized until late in her life, when she started to lose her edge in that department because of the dementia. Anyways, that is what I miss tonight, that interaction with her. Even as she started to decline she always had the energy and where-with-all to pull it together for a little conversation with me. I may have just talked to my Dad about how she was having a hard day putting things together and how he was concerned about how she was holding up, but when he turned the phone over to her I knew she was okay when I heard her clear her throat before saying hello. She always did that, the clearing the throat thing was habitual before starting a conversation on the phone. I love that I knew that about her. These phone conversations helped me keep tabs on her when I wasn't able to make it over for a visit or she wasn't able to come here. But, the last week of her life she wouldn't talk to me on the phone anymore. Not a word. She was leaving me and I knew our relationship was changing, that was a hard road to cross. Many would say she is my angel now, and I believe this and find comfort in it, but I still miss those basic interactions I had with her. Ones that on a night like tonight, I would pick up the phone and tell my Mom a story or two about our week.

A story like how I woke up in the middle of last night to find Harrison fully awake in his room, light on, with Grey our cat playing a game of chase, jumping, running, you name it. Obviously I didn't realize Grey was in the room when I went to bed, but I suspect that Harrison knew all along and didn't tell me there was an extra guest in his room when I said goodnight to him. Sneaky, sneaky. The funny thing is I think they both enjoyed the little encounter. Grey tried to snuggle his way up to Harrison's door after I kicked him out of it, trying to charm his way back in. Harrison woke up this morning, late this morning, talking all about how Grey kitty slept by his feet and hid under the bed and how he tried to catch him. Then he ran downstairs and tried to find his furry little friend to relive the adventure. I'm afraid the daylight hours didn't quite hold the same effect as a mid-night rendezvous. Grey ran the other direction when he saw him. Great story, right? Well, at least she would have thought so...

Anyways, thanks for listening, that helped, I'll get up off of the couch now and I'm sure things will start to feel a little easier. :)

Summertime

Summertime with the Thomas Family looks something like this...

A summer tradition, Thomas the Tank in Midway.  (This is as close of a photo opp with Thomas that we could get, Harrison was not a fan of the train whistle.)

Oma thought Harrison looked so old here and I have to agree.  When did he turn into a little boy and not my baby?

And Carter pulling himself up now, not walking yet, but I'm not rushing it.

As Harrison refered to it, "Mother's Time" AKA Mother's Day.  Notice the candy necklace on my wrist and neck, compliments of Harrison.  Evidently he was pretty opinionated about what Mom would like for her present.

Harrison's soccer team.  By the end he was tackling kids on the field.  I have that to call improvement, I'll take it, not bad.

My baby is 1.  We had a great party...

However, he wasn't even slightly impressed by the cake...

Sad, it's my party and I'll cry if I want too!

It really can happen...

So Chris and I finally got away for a few days just by ourselves to Laguna Beach!!  A couple pics as proof below...

Laguna Beach tidepools...

It wasn't quite swimsuit weather yet, but I did manage to lounge by the beach and read anyways.

We got together with our good friends the Everys.  Sarah and I have been BFFs since kindergarden!

We decided to go to California Adventure one of the evenings!  Like quick-fast running through the park evening.  This is Chris in front of the Ferris Wheel that was our one regret, I get motion sickness and we went on the basket that rocks back and forth A LOT.  Ya, I'm a total wimp, ever since...well, long story.

This is us on the Hotel of Terror ride, can you see me gripping on to Chris for dear life.  I screamed like a "girl" the whole time.

It was awesome, special thanks to Amy and Dane for taking the boys while we were gone.  You guys rock!

Dad's Office

Harrison is obsessed with two things lately:  Legos and Dad's office.  So, it's only natural that he would combine the two.  Today, he was busy building Dad's office and this is what he came up with, very proud of it too.

Carter of course wanted to put "Dad's office" in his mouth.  The scene was not pretty, I had to intervene for the safety and sanity of both parties involved.  

Swine Flu or something like that...

This is me after a night and a day or fever, chills, vomiting and finally rest.  There's a reason you're only seeing my eyes, it just gets worse from there.  Pretty sure the swine flu (okay, I'm being dramatic) hit the Thomas house this weekend.  If by chance I passed it on to you, I AM SO SORRY!

PS - Harrison and Carter are doing fine, we've had better days, but we're hanging in there...

Easter

Easter was sooo fun!  I have a few pictures, but of course their not ready.  But, Harrison loved it and had a great time, 2 Easter egg hunts, basket in the morning, cute church outfit (his first tie, he was totally excited about) chocolate supply for awhile, and nice family dinner at the end.

We also had a great little FHE tonight to review the true meaning of Easter.  Here's how it went:

We had a paper cutout of Jesus' Tomb, with a rock cutout and a Jesus cutout and I was trying to show him what happened on Easter.  We went through the story and I felt like, whew, I think he kinda getting it.  He would move the rock away from the tomb and bring Jesus up through the tomb door and say, "Yay!"  I told him that's what Easter was all about.  You know, not bad for a 3 year-old.  He was a little confused and asked at one point, "Where's the Easter Bunny?"  Well, maybe we're not quite clear, but we're working on it.

For me, I have moved on from the Easter Bunny, and truly feel blessed to understand more fully what it's all about.  I loved the General Conference talk by Elder Holland, here is part of his Easter message.  His words about Christ were beautiful and inspired...

Happy Birthday!

Harrison's birthday - He's 3 and so big now.  He loved having his own birthday and all the attention that went with it.  The highlights were bowling with the family, Harrison wanting to give his presents to everyone else, the German Chocolate loveliness of a cake, having Oma come out especially for Harrison and just a celebration of Harrison and the special boy that he is.  I could just tell he loved every minute of the day and all the little surprises that came with it.  I am blessed to have a family that loves my child and supports Chris and I in all our efforts...thank you!

"I'm supposed to blow out the candles and I practiced and practiced, but when it came time I got scared and had to have Mom help."  

Love the cake!

Yes, that's a Ute soccer ball, given to him by his Oma.  I can't really say anything about that, I was just excited that she travelled all the way out for the birthday. ;)

Look how pleased he looks!